doubting myself...

This is juz something i wanna say...

Once again, I losing confidence in myself...I think I'm so weak...sometimes I wished I never ever learn dizi. It brings me more unhappiness den happiness. I feel so stupid...I mean, I can't even learn it well after such a long time...damn useless me...But it definitely bring me satisfaction. During the time when I dint learn dizi, I actually feel that I am TOTALLY useless, at least it gives me some ideas of what i going to be in the future. And I finally have something to do, not staying at home doing nth. Now, I have an aim/goal (thks goodness) thks cory for listening to my "stupid" nagging...I so damn selfish...but let me finish what I have to say...I don't expect anyone to read this...juz wanna say it...
Nevertheless, I 'm a TOTALLY USELESS gurl! Is this juz one of my growing up process, hmm...maybe...
BEING CRAZY AND LAUGHING LIKE A MAD WOMAN IS A GOOD WAY OF RELIEVING STRESS.
SIGINING OFF*
JAce

Did I sound THAT bad??

Met my primary school frenz...well...they smaller den me by one year...but taller den me...arghh..not fair! :(
chat with them, almost one, two years never chat with them like tt le...one of them is my neighbour and she said she could hear me practising. I was like wat the, when I heard her saying tt...and she said it is horrible esp. when i go out of tune...dotz...i thought i had improved but i tink i was VERY VERY WRONG! Now i dunno how to practise le. Dun care bah, juz practise the way i wan until somebody complains which i hope will not happen...haha...touchwood*
DEN i keep asking myself, did i blow tt badly?? well, I guess i did, haha...so tough...the process is so tough and tired...Juz try my best bah...
Tml going out with them...yeah! after such a long time, I finally can go out and play le...:)
I not really going to play though, juz buying some stuff. Den return home practise again...haha

dad's back

and i getting sleepy.

Signing off*
JAce

U SUCKZ...

hey, I gotta kill ***, wat the hell, made us so stress. Made yijie cried somemore, U BETTER BEWARE OF ME, COZ SOMEDAY, I GOTTA KILL U!
It not as if we dint tried to practise and I'm very very sure that yijie got find time to practise. It's juz tt we dint practise as much as before. BUT HALLO?!, we having three practices in a week, and including enrichment programmes, it's not as if we dint tried to find time at all.
I know you have high expectation of us, but hey, can you juz give us some more time?, juz a little more will do...
We will definitely practise better and more de... but you have to wait till our enrichment programmes are over, which is only the short play...please...(wat the heck, not as if he will see my blog)

YU SU ZHE BU DA...(:

JIAYOU!!!

Signing off*
JAce

Juz wanna say something...

Now is 12.48 am,

I shld be sleeping by now, esp. I have to go to school tomorrow in the morning and have to wake up by 5.30. But, I am not having that right kind of mood...I mean, there something that I wan to say so...I come here to post another entry when I realised I have no one to talk to. It is not really no one but there is no RIGHT person...Sometimes I feel that blog is juz a personal diary, maybe there are somebody reading my blog, but to me, I can only imagine myself reading my own blog...

I have some problems memorising...I was given 3 slides and I have to present the project tomorrow...The marks will be added to our results so I can't juz don't care about it...So I memorise the stuff in the textbook and I hope that the teacher don't know that I have taken from the textbook. Hey, I hope she don't have her textbook with her tomorrow:) Better if she don't come...opps* :x

Someone blamed me juz now...I don't know whether I shld use the word 'blamed' but I don't feel that well after he say that...I actually juz asked him some qn. I don't know that he was that busy so I will apologise for disturbing him. I treat him abit like my 'teacher' as in if I have any qn on study, I will ask him, But now, I don't think I dare to do so again. I think I been disturbing others, I keep on asking qn and somehow I think I am shameless...watever...I don't like the idea of my sis knowing how to go to my blog...HEY, KDEN AKA JANICE AKA MY SIS, IF YOU SEE MY BLOG...PLEASE! GET OUT OF HERE IMMEDIATELY!!! AND DON'T EVER COME IN AGAIN!!! ( I know this is kinda rude, but I juz don't want you to come here, at all)

I practised today, somehow irritated, esp. when people keep on entering the room and cause me to stop...erm...I don't dare to blow in front of others...I know this is kinda weird...My sis say I blow very loud, and hey, that is a good news :) coz huang lao shi and my 'teacher' always say that I blow very soft...if I can blow loud, that is good:) But, BUT, I still having problems with 'gu su xing', my qi and my kou feng...I think I better be patient about this...yu su zhe bu da...means if you do something too fast and not carefully, you will not reach the standard you want. Hey, Jin lao shi tells me that before:)

I better go and sleep. I think I will leave anything till tomorrow...I haven't study my science and I CANNOT fail it as it is included in my results too...I still wanna get money at the end of the year :)
But I will try my best, DEFINITELY, yeah...wish me luck for the presentation tomorrow ;)

Signing off*
JAce

I need help here...

yup:)

ytd I gone to pa, and asked well, him to help me with my xiao c part in feng...I want to blow louder but I can't, I really need help in THAT... but he say that it is my dizi problem and he advise me to change for another one...yeah...somehow I think that my dizi may be a bit of a problem...but I dun really want to change for another one...it is not becauseI already get use to that dizi...but I somehow dun bear to change another one. That xiao c...was given to me when I not in a very good situation, and it actually give me some...err...hope...I mean, when I have this dizi, it somehow give me the energy to practise. I want to blow at my best, using that dizi to blow feng. And everytime when I successfully reach the point which I set myself, I have a great sense of satisfaction. well, I have some feelings with that dizi...I know it's quite lame to some of u, but...haiz...nevermind...I think I have to consult someone else about this. I feel a bit hopeless at this point of time, actually, I dunno who to ask, watever...hey, but I learn how to blow louder on other dizi not xiao c, he taught that, great...

Currently, I practising gu su xing...I can actually practise and type at the same time...I slack during my practice, thus resulting in this kind of standard...I guess I can say"serve me right"...haha...

ok...end here bah...
Signing off*

JAce
Signing off

Some exhibiton photos:)

well, this is clearer coz this was taken using Yijie's phone and I took it from her...Thkz Yijie:)
btw, this is the giant dizi. Although you cannot see how 'giant' it is, at least you can see one of the dragons carved on it :)
fine, I know this one super blur...not my fault, phone's fault... it's very small thus no choice, I had to enlarge it. Anyway, the longer ones are the xiao whereas the shorter ones are the dizi. They are very'normal' dizi and xiao...I like mine better :)
well, this is the pipa with 88 bats carved on it. My handphone is not tt good thus it's very very blur and you can't see the bats. I apologised for that...anw, it's really very beautiful.watsmore, it's limited edition:)
This is erm...the 'expensive' coffee or cappucino or watever it is...yeah...fine, I know it's lame...
btw, it's quite blur...

okay, I only managed to upload some of the photos onto the comp, so...others nice nice ones cannot show...cried**....anw...bye:)

Signing off*
JAce

HaPpY bDaY tO SiNgApOrE!!

It's National Day today. The day is fine, the weather is fine, my mood is fine. But, MY day is so damn boring. I practised but I slacked during that period of time, yeah...and I'm not feeling that well...stupid cough, I wonder how I going to practise tomorrow...
Anyway, I watched 'A Cinderella Story' and it's not so bad, quite well anyway(hey, I watch it at home, dvd)...I still haven't study and I had already opened the book but my mind is not focusing...haha...we had our first class bbq yesterday and it was fun and I loved to barbeque the food ( so stop telling me to go and eat.) I hardly go for this kind of gathering and this was the secind time I went for a barbeque...yeah... I really hope that there will be another gathering, whether it is simply a barbeque, a chalet, or juz going out together...It's juz fun being together with the class..

I'm feeling quite hopeless today esp. when I couldn't meet my own expectations. I already tried, but I juz couldn't blow as the way I want, or maybe I juz simply didn't tried my best...yeah, I guess that the reason. And I feel that I'm really learning very very slow. I mean, I didn't think that I had improved, it looks more like I had deproved or watever it is...And I think my 'teacher' is going to say something tomorrow...well...I better be mentally prepare...yeah...and I better study...so ermm....bye...

One good thing to say:
"Never let the fear of striking out keeps you from the game",
By Someone.

Signing off*
JAce...

ToDaY cRaCk EgG...

Haha...my bday today...well...not tt fun...well...not fun at all...coz lots of bad things happen today and it dampen my mood...anw, I didn't had tt bday mood also...

NO celebration...haha...coz I return home abt 7 plus, going to reach 8. Having lesson with my senior...EXTREMELY StReSs...(I dun think he will come across my blog hor...)

Hey, bt I got practise hor. It just tt I practise lesser mah..I already trying my best to find some time to practise, Yijie also. Whatsmore, we got practice during breaks also ><
Like before swimming starts, we go co room practise loh den reach pool late liao.

I will try my best de...Cannot also must can...

I gonna failed my science, it's a sure-fail. Coz i done it totally WRONG!!! I mixed up the independent and dependent. I know tt's stupid to even mixed them up...fine...

So watever x 3...today had past and tomorrow will come...

A better day will come bah...

Signing off*
JAce